The answer is positively YES. It is not uncommon for a couple to separate after having a child. It is also fairly common for the two parents to decide to try and “work it out outside of court” regarding the custody and care of their child. I have seen this time and time again, and it almost never works. In fact, I have yet to come across a situation where it has worked.

A multitude of things can happen which destroy this informal arrangement. In my experience with these situations, the downfall of the informal arrangement is usually due to one parent becoming less and less involved with the child and thus leaving all the parenting duties to the other parent. This causes a ton of animosity and quite frankly is totally unfair to both the parent and the child. This stressful situation can be avoided simply by obtaining a custody order. This document will clearly state each parent’s responsibilities with regard to when they will have the child. Additionally, it will account for holidays and vacation time so both parents will know in advance and can plan accordingly.

So how does one go about obtaining a custody order? Each jurisdiction has different local rules, but generally speaking, it begins with a document called a custody complaint (unless it is part of a divorce, then the procedure is slightly different). If you have an existing custody order that needs to be changed or adjusted for some reason, this can be achieved by filing a petition to modify. If you think your situation calls for a custody order or calls for changes to your existing custody order, make sure you contact an experienced family law attorney.

Next week, I’ll cover the basics surrounding child support.

Robert E. Fravel is a solo practitioner in Bucks County, Pennsylvania. You can contact him at ref@fravel-law.com or (267) 227-9138.